Ask Sugar!

Q. How do you respond to the question, “What kind of allowance do you have in mind?” Also, how do you make it known that you have no intentions of intimacy until he has invested in you?


A. The allowance I ask for depends on who I’m talking to, how much he makes, and what he has given his past girlfriends. Always ask questions to figure out his finances to get an idea of what he can reasonably give you. If he’s higher up on the white collar ladder such as a real estate developer, you should start with a high amount. $5,000/mo or more wouldn’t be an unrealistic ask for someone who is rich. Plenty of women are getting a lot more than that. If he's on the lower end like 100k/ year, still throw out a high number and work from there. You just never know. The numbers game is tricky and can go so many ways but you shouldn’t accept less than $1000/month, as a sugarbaby. Some of us start out small and greatly increase our allowances over time. When I first started seeing my longtime SD, we started at $500/mo with a few perks and went up to $3,000. I was a newbie then and would never accept less than a $1,000 now because I’ve dated men who made big money and had no problem handing it over fast. $1000 is just a bare minimum guideline. If getting that or more sounds really difficult to you, you’re talking to the wrong men and don’t have the confidence to ask.

As far as intimacy, I simply don’t respond to advances of men who aren’t paying my way and no woman ever should. A little vague flirting is fine but never send nudes or sleep with men who aren’t doing anything for you. I’m often asked how soon the conversation should turn to money. It’s as soon as he starts assuming you want to fuck him. If he’s not opening his wallet substantially after you’ve made it clear you expect to be taken care of, block his pathetic ass on every platform you’ve ever spoken to him and move on. It’s that simple. The men who see your value won’t hesitate to spend. The women who get what they want know this.

Sugar